Before the Adoption (PART 2: MY FOSTER FAMILY)

 NOTICE: All names have been changed to protect the identity and privacy of those involved with this part of my story.

    Just after I was apprehended from my bio parents I went to stay with a very nice foster family. The parents loved children very much and they were so glad to have me as a foster daughter. The foster mother, enjoyed having me around and she really loved me very much. My foster father, he loved being around me and he was very down to earth and he was very grateful to have had the pleasure of fostering me. From what I can remember the family took very good care of me, and they had given me the best life for about nine or ten months of my life, and I was like a huge part of their family. They had been a huge part of my family as well, even after the adoption, and after we lost contact; some years later, after the adoption.

    In a moment I will be writing a very important message here for them. I do from time to time think of them, and sometimes I do want to reach out to them. It's like they make a huge difference in my life, and if it weren't for them honestly; I don't even think I would be this woman in which, I am today. I don't think I'd be as strong as I am.

LETTER TO FOSTER MOTHER (GRANDMA)

Dear Grandma,

    I know you're watching me as I write this. I know you're gone now but, I wish I had known that you were sick. I wish I had been their for you, and I wish I could talk to you just one more time. I really wanted to get back into contact with you but, I didn't know how. I've been scared just to reach out to you. You had been such a big part of my life until I was between the ages 7 to 9 ish. You saved me by loving me whole heartedly and just being there for me when no one could be there for me. You were my voice when I couldn't speak, you were my shelter when I didn't have one, and you were someone I looked up to, respected and loved so much; even now I love you. You are my family, no matter what, and I have thought about you for years.

    You and Grandpa are the greatest gifts I've ever received in my life, and I love you so, so very much. I just wish I had more time with you. More time to talk, smile and see you. I hope one day I will get to see you again, and until then I know that you are guiding me through the rest of my life to be the person I was meant to be, never to judge and never to regret the decisions I have made so far. The only regret I have is not keeping contact with you, when you were here. You were, are and have always been a big part of my journey.

    The worst thing is, you didn't know how much I had loved you, and will continue to love you. You and Grandpa both saved my life, and I know that you do know that. I know you are watching me from above, and that makes me feel good that I still have you there, no matter what. My heart goes out to your family.

Love, 

Baby Stephanie


LETTER TO FOSTER FATHER (GRANDPA)

Dear Grandpa,

    I know you are gone now, and you will always be on my mind, in my soul and a huge part of my life. I know you've been gone for a while now, and I know Grandma is with you now. I was one of the luckiest foster children to have two loving people apart of my life. I know that most children don't get the love that I had received from you and Grandma. I just wish that I had kept in contact with the both of you. Sometimes I wish the both of you had adopted me but, then I realize that when you had fostered me the both of you were older.

    I love you, and Grandma so much and you both had a huge impact on my life. I just wish I got to tell you that in person. Maybe it would have helped me move on from some of my earlier demons. Like the fact my biological mother is a selfish, money hungry, Narcissist, or the fact that she left me in a motel room. A long time ago, I learned that all family isn't blood, family are the people who showed you love and respect, no matter who you are. You and your family showed me what a family is, and how they are supposed to treat you. You will always be my family. The both of you.

    You showed me what love is, and how to respect, and I am so ever grateful for you and Grandma. I wish you could have seen me graduate from high school and now college in two years. I wish you had been there to help me when things got ruff, and I lost everything but, I know that sometimes life gives us lemons, make lemonade right? I know you are watching over me, and I will forever love you; no matter where my life takes me from here.

Love,

Baby Stephanie


CONCLUSION

    My foster parents (Grandma and Grandpa) as you can tell have made a huge impact on my life. They took me in as one of their own, treated me with love, respect and loyalty; and somehow I feel like I didn't show them the same faith. I honestly feel so bad that I wasn't there for them more before they had died but, the lesson here is don't be afraid to be loved, to show those around you the love you want to show them, and to be there for the ones you honestly want to show love to.

    Honestly, my advice is it's never too late to tell those around you that you love them, and show them how much you really want them in your life. After finding out that my foster Grandma had died, I really needed to feel the way I actually felt about here. She was my light, she tough me more about myself, then I thought I had known about me. I knew I loved the both of them but, it wasn't until now that I had found out how much I actually did. I LOVE THEM BOTH TO INFINITY AND BEYOND! And I will never stop loving them ever.


DEDICATION:

    This blog post is dedicated to the foster family. You had been such a big part of my life. I just wish I could have spent more time with you and Grandma and Grandpa. You made a huge difference in my life and I am so sorry that I didn't tell you all sooner.

    My heart goes out to you and your family in these trying times.

    

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